Thoughts escape
running like small children
from the calls of parents
Desire seeps into the soul
like the kisses
from the passed
Love is destroyed
like hurricanes in cities
that were never built to last
Hatred is controlled
but insides are left in ruin
by a memory of the past
Truth is never real
identify with what you see
by the dye that was cast
Lies are a necessity
to protect from understanding
the eyes behind the mask
To live and to die
faithfully in love
is all that's ever asked
Propped up by lies
and promises
I fall away
with disappointment
Collapse with the weight
of consciousness
reality is too heavy
to hold
your filth is
shaping me,
you voice
raping me,
your thoughts are
taking me,
oh please God
hold on to me…
I need the lies,
I need your promises,
I need all the cries to all the skies…
To create this necklace of discontent
Draped across my cut throat
Death brings discovery
Of what you meant…
And every minute spent…
Is wasted on… "I Love You"
You don't know me and never will
understanding serves to kill
the peaceful mind that's standing still
quiet your mind and you might find
the truth to me
the truth to you
let me do me
while you do you
the lie will die
in the empty sky
never will you wonder why
without something to identify
I am me just like you
I don't need these things
to see what's true
all that's left is me
and you….
Now you see what's really there
when no ones left to lie and care
journey with me if you dare
but only after my soul lay's bare
Only then can you really grasp it
picture yourself inside that casket
let your fears drift on by
fight it…? Don't even try
Accept the pain for it wont last
the pain of life is sure to pass
just like death, its not forever
neither is the term "together"
I'm not my job
I'm not my child
I'm not the smoke
nor black and mild's
I'm not the beer
I'm not the weed
I'm not your fears
nor good deeds
I'm not my responsibility
liberated; set me free
of all the things I used to be
I feel I have to disagree
I'm just someone sent to earth
been the same since my birth
here are my words for what its worth
I hope this doesn't make things worse
but I wouldn't give a damn
if you told me that's all I am
because I've realized what's true
there is no me
and there is no you
Don't form words you don't understand
call me what you will without recognition
what was the basis for your decision?
want to play and keep me locked away
your special escape
it feels like rape
you want everything
your favorite word is take
masked behind give
all serve to let it live
when all it needs to do is lie
never oh no never
not you but only me
undeserved of free
but cry for me
while you lie to me
it doesn't hurt
but tastes like dirt
spitting the mud
that mixes
when I'm honest
such a dirty word
tainted by the truth
smile with all your mirth
as you eat the icing
and throw away the cake
cry over the things you make
sorry but this time…
I cannot relate
I want no part
of your "understanding"
just leave me to my meandering
wandering wondering
of what you meant
when you made mud pies
out of purity
my vision blurry
with all my fury
as I eat your pie
tasting the lie
with a smile
and why?
Because I love you
until I die
unless….
unless their wrong
unless they lie
unless I believe
unless I kneel
try to tell me how to feel
when sometimes all there is…
is kill
they tried to tell me
they tried to sell me
but never did they try to help me
buy your way into the light
while I give to the shadows
waiting for the return
not of Christ but of real Christians
as if you could label redemption
doesn't every bible have a price tag?
but then again they never mention…
the truth
only directions
to your plate made of gold
how can you be so bold?
to call me a heathen
instead of your brethren
just because the tithe
cuts like a knife
I read words written in red
and they never said
that you could get rich
by the spirit of the poor
forget the sermon
just ask for more
The best you can do is point to the truth
the hand pointing is a lie
you are not the truth
so point to god
show me the way
in your 3 piece suit
and isn't it ironic
the finger you point with
wrapped in gold
cant seem to hold
a steady course.
See you in hell fuckers.
In my life I'm seeing double
truth and lies my mind is trouble
thoughts wake ruin in this sleepy death
held it firmly with in a breath
Expel the good unto the wasted
Hold the evil until I taste it
focus inward protect the weak
in my eyes come take a peak
See the pain deep inside
for all those tears I refused to cry
don't let it out it needs to stay
it dies with me there is no way
I dominate the inner me
with nothing good to set me free
locked behind these smiling eyes
is a child who desperately tries
to face the things of his own creation
the madness with no correlation
I know so much and oh so little
is this but one of gods great riddles?
To know the end and not the beginning?
Death is pure but life is sinning?
In my mind the devils grinning
cause in my heart I know he's winning
I'm dying to live
passionate and satisfied
you touch and you lie
as life drifts by
Diseased.
unfulfilled and bare
living with the cold
unloving air
breathless i take
a moment to care
to sit and fathom
the times so rare...
I'm dying to live
Loved and forgiven
Forgotten yet driven
Rotten yet still living
Pathetic
Worthless rope
Breaks with the fall
I lie alone
Thinking...
Dreaming...
With false hope
I'm dying to live
forgive all my pain
as it makes no sense
to those that are absent
of understanding
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