Talk for me

I try to separate heart from mind
But blinding hate starts to find

Memories of love unkind

I can't leave it up to thought

The destruction found with needs untaught

Disappear from heart bound faith

Retreat within my mind that's safe

Replace me with your busy bee

I'm still left wandering in blackness free

But tell me how I really feel

Unspoken vows are some how real

I keep my soul from definition

Even from my hearts dissension

Traitorous feelings taking form

Conforming me unto norm

But why should I stay within this court

With love and thoughts in complete discord

But what about those little voices

Drag me through your shattered choices

Force my hand into applause

Smiling now but just because

I have no direction and no shoes for walking

Crumpled and listening to those voices talking

Directing my fate like I'm not there

But who ever said that life was fair

I guess this is how it was meant to be

Those voices talking

Talking for me…

Longing Indifference

Give into this emotional reverence of ego minded chaos

Rising inside you tormenting your look

Keep on saying you love

Until it just becomes something you think you should say

Like its an apology

Like those three words can somehow erase the damage done by the outbursts that come uncontrolled from deep within your soul…

Tell me you'll leave

Tell me you'll roll

Just to see how the words take hold

Waiting for the tears to fall to some how justify your reason for being

Hurt me by staying or hurt me by leaving

Poison is poison

No matter what glass you put it in

I drink it down so it can begin again

Here are the tears I'll never show you

Here are the lies I never told you

Here is the anger I never let loose

Braid them together to form a noose

Hang me with my own emotions

But why me?

Why choose me who was already hurting

Make me smile make me laugh

Then mark irony on the epitaph

Cause I got built up to get shot down

Breaking promises only I can hear

Taking away all of my fear

Only to replace it with a false security of longing indifference

Like I said…

I love…

But can I finish the sentence?

With all the emotion and all of the pain

When lightning crashes and tears fall like rain

Will this be the proof you need to close the case?

Do I have to feel this for you to know

That everything I live for is only a show

For how much I love you?

I won't look passed you

Only above you.

Praying to a god I know never cared

Hoping my mind can align itself with truth

The truth to me the truth to you

An honest portrait

Of an honest love renewed

A time warp back to when I didn't know

A time before the curtain opened

And the show began

Reliving the reruns

Of smiling ignorance

Heart whispering thoughts

Protected by fence

Walls without gates

Lives without fates

Just two people enjoying

the slow inevitable dying

Making the most out of quietly smiling

“I’m Fine”

The ebb and flow

The rising tide

Climbs high inside my mind without the time to explain to me…

Why…

My marigo round shit storm of violence

Screams me down inside

But out…

Silence

Just a plastic grin of hope

With skinny limbs

And eyes on dope

The only reason

That most elope

Is a stubborn refusal to give in to rope

But should that be what life is about

Quietly smiling while dying in sight

Of every one quietly smiling

But wait mother fucker

Listen to YOU whining

Spilling your damaged spinning marigo round mind

Falling to the ground one at a time

Hoping to find solace with in rhyme

Dusting myself off

Exclaiming a lie

"I'm fine…"

The Memory of Sleepy Children

How can something so empty, make my chest constricted

Drifting freely on the canvas, thoughts come so conflicted

To this feeling, the righteous child, anger so addictive

Long for peace, the future spoke, when all my pain is lifted

But all my childish words of 'I'

dance naked upon my tattered heart

Little whispers that sleep with 'lie'

Entrance my mind from the start

Devilish little lighthearted 'why?'

Rifts the soul and peace apart

Even when it's names 'divine'

Self serving mind, oh so smart…

What can come after sleepy children laid to rest?

A bed of pain to sleep in, disaster pulled to chest

Dreams of painted faces, a present unconfessed

Awakened by a memory, of peaceful, cold unrest

But all my childish words will die

With lies I choose to build them

Growing deep inside my mind

A prophecy… should I fulfill them

The little whispers heard were mine

Reality being what killed them

Trapped inside of heart and time

The memories of sleepy children…

The Emerald Curtain

How great the days turning to night… passing gently if not swiftly.
How great the smiles turning to fight… moving on swiftly if not gently.
Bumpy roads
Rocking cradle
Fear of life
Without a label
Looking to a memory that is no longer true…
Even if the thoughts of past are a part of you
Forward thinking
So unseemly
Living on hope and borrowed time
I will choose to dance like wild children
And watch the world burn
Rather than stand before the scythe
Waiting for my turn
What was
Is no longer
What will be
Uncertain
The present so confusing
Behind the emerald curtain.
Do not cry for the past that did not last
Do not scan the horizon for the answer
It could be happiness…
Or a disaster
Made of cancer.
Look at the light in the eyes of wild children dancing on a world left burning
Happy or sad angry or dead the world will keep on turning.

Just A Thought

What a way to start the day
Just another show for me
Grinning at the new beginning
Rise and shine dying man
Step your death
To a beautiful dance
And whistle your last breath
Smile or cry its all the same
We all leave as we came...

Black Paint...

Look through tears as your past echoes with laughter taunting all you held as mine

Such a pretty portrait painted of yourself lacking all shadows and straight flowing lines

The blank spots on the tapestry a necessary reminder that your truth is incomplete

Lest the boundaries of your life be torn and past and future compete

But so discreetly whisper the poison born from experience driven delusion

Until the very smiles you've worn tatter to empty wide eyed confusion

As you look around at your world made sober, laughter coming faint

What will you do with emptiness made over? Walls worn with black paint...