Last Laugh

Completely and totally numb
Lacking emotional or physical pain
Fuzzy around the edges
Extremely blurry is the brain
Accepting the fact that I'm dead
I have nothing but respect
for what lies rotting in my head
Some pretend like they understand
While failing to comprehend
I destroy myself
In order to begin again
Recreating my madness
Hardening this heart and soul
Towards all sorrow and sadness
Leaving no room for love and hate
So only fear remains
Struggling futilely
Against fearless iron chains
I've attached to my conscience
Which is screaming
Now utterly insane
I get the last laugh
Knowing I have only myself to blame